John's mom (aka Mum) is moving back to Maine this weekend. After over two decades of Florida living - during which she never once
turned on the air conditioning in her tiny studio apartment - she's
decided to swing to the other extreme and never feel warm again.
::finger guns wink wink HEYOOO Mainers, just kidding::
The rest of John's family still lives up there, including Mum's grandkids and now
great grandkids, so she has lots to go home to. Plus all the local
pizza joints up there sell whoopie pies, so I can see the appeal. (Whoopie pies
are a heavenly northern creation that's basically a cake hamburger,
except instead of a meat patty you get icing, and instead of a bun you
get cake, and instead of lettuce and tomato you get a brief nirvanic
experience that assures you all is right with the world.) (I'm a fan.)
We
want to send Mum off with a proper to-do, so I've been planning a party
for the night before her flight. Well, "party" is a bit generous. It'll just be us, Mum, and
John's sister who's flying down to help with the last minute details. We'll all be in masks and distancing, so I guess it's less like a "party"
and more like a wait at the DMV, only with a "Bon Voyage" banner
and balloons.
Hmm. Yeah, I definitely need to up my game here.
I am
proud of what I brainstormed for Mum's going-away gifts, though. (Don't worry, she's not online and won't
see this.) Mum LOVES a big to-do, loves surprises and celebrations
and making the mundane into an occasion. This is a woman who
once gift-wrapped a single-serve bottle of ketchup and made a dramatic
presentation with it. She won't have much room in her suitcase,
though, so I needed little things, with an emphasis on quantity over
quality to make it fun.
Here's what I've got so far:
First we'll have a
card saying we got her a few Florida mementos, then the first gift
will read,
"When you miss the Florida sunshine, wear these."
Sun Hoop Earrings
(I'll add
links since everything's from Amazon, but this is more about the ideas behind the gifts than the actual stuff.)These
are super cute in person, and came with 4 different
styles of earring backs, so you can choose your favorite. Not bad for $10 earrings.
Next a silly one:
"When you miss the power outages during hurricane season, turn out the lights and use this to find the bathroom."
I like that this one's still practical: I have a push light in my purse and it is a lifesaver
when you're looking for lip balm or dropped M&Ms. This comes in a
teeny gift box with extra batteries, plus a cute little Stormtrooper
charm that John is totally keeping.
Mum
once asked for a plastic flamingo for her birthday, saying she wanted
to lean in to the classic Florida retiree look, and has proudly displayed
it on her porch ever since. SO...
"When you miss all the glorious tackiness that is quintessential FLORIDA, look at these beauties and remember 'tacky' is only a state of mind."